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Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: June 12th, 2023

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  • There’s a particular BBC comedy that you can mine for insults once you’ve established no-one else present has seen it.

    • He’s so dense light bends around him.
    • As useless as a marzipan dildo
    • As useless as lube at a funeral
    • I’ve never seen anyone look so fucking ugly with just one head
    • Do you know 90% of household dust is made of dead human skin? That’s what you are to me.
    • Watching him work is like watching clown running across a minefield.
    • He’s here, depriving a village somewhere of their twat.
    • I’m like flypaper for dickheads today.
    • Sorry I’m late. Traffic was an absolute bitch. No offence.






  • rmuk@feddit.uktolinuxmemes@lemmy.worldmeme
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    8 months ago

    Corrections:

    MacOS:

    • Featureless Apple™-branded oblong with 195% profit margin (support for 160% profit margin dropped in Apple™ Mac™OS™ 12.8.3.1.6.4 West Coast Yuppie Resort)
    • Devices no more than two years old
    • No pride, self-respect, personality, etc, except that provided by ownership of Apple™ products.

    For Windows:

    • CPU generation newer than an arbitrary, shifting and easily-bypassed watershed.
    • 1, 2, 4, 16 or 128GB of RAM, depends who you ask.
    • Windows License 😉
    • Copilot+ AI requires Microsoft CoPilot+ AI compatible Microsoft CoPilot+ AI CoProcessor+ and Microsoft CoPilot+ CoProcessor+ AI Microsoft CertificAItion+
    • A lack of awareness or interest in operating systems.

    For Linux:

    • Turing-completeness.
    • Memory, networking, inputs, outputs, power (optional).
    • Another computer to occasionally Google who ‘initramfs’ is and why he won’t let you boot.






  • Depends on your local laws and such, but in most European countries you can get a prepaid SIM card for a couple of euros/pounds/whatever at any supermarket, making them practically free. If you need a temporary number for a scammy special offer or any situation where your number is publicly visible (Gumtree, etc) it’s a no-brainer IMHO.

    If your phone suppprts running two SIMs at once, it has two IMEIs so as far as the network(s) are concerned it’s two distinct handsets unless they deduce otherwise.

    A fun aside: years ago I did some work for a small phone company (the company was small, not the phone) and they gave me a SIM with 100 numbers in a block and access to a portal I could manage them with. Sadly, I forgot to pay the annual £10 renewal fee.






  • A lot of the convenience of the modern UK high street baking sector is because of Girobank, the 1960s Government’s successful attempt to force modernisation on the banking industry. When I hear about the ass-backwardsness of other country’s banking arrangements (especially the US) I give a little thankyou to Girobank.

    Edit: Also, yes, tourist ATMs are predatory bullshit.