Headlines from our current era that would totally baffle people just 10/20/30 years ago.
Naw. They’ve already come across rule 34.
They’ll just assume we’re freaks, like everyone else
A lot of people are saying he did in fact have sex with a couch
I believe the preferred nomenclature is couch botherer
Couch roommate.
Step-couch what are you doing?
Because it was actually a loveseat.
True is it was a futon… But since futons can “transform” JD could never admit to sleeping with something is “trans”
You win the internet today 1000%.
I mean can anyone prove he didn’t or hasn’t?
Everyone keeps saying JD fucked the couch but I know the true story… JD got raw dogged by the couch. Let’s just say, calling him a tight ass is no longer literal.
A searchable PDF of the memoir includes 10 mentions of the word “couch” or “couches,”
AP: “We’re not actually reading that garbage but Ctrl+F find nothing.”
An Associated Press reporter reviewed pages 179 to 181 in a physical copy
“Ok,we read 3 pages.”
No, JD Vance did not fuck a couch.
A couch fucked JD Vance. There’s not a chance in hell he’s the pitcher.
🤣
He’s a couchfucker
People are saying he did have sex with a couch.
Eh, whether he wrote about it in his book or not he totally has the look of a couch humper. I would also guess he likes to pee in the bathtub. I mean just look at him.
Whoever Harris picks for veep, I’d like to see an ad of them saying “I believe JD Vance when he says he never had sex with his couch.”
I don’t think it was even his, he apparently did it in a store…
Are you sure? Lots of people are saying he did. Lots.
This is so fucking funny.
When the main discourse around your new running mate is whether or not he fucked a couch, you did not pick a strong candidate. Trumps gotta be pissed.
Maybe not, but it’s out there apparently and the Internet is fueled by <60 second attention spans.
